i think

i think she replied to my entry.

i always think of her as someone who is good with words.
who always made you think about stuff.
and somehow makes you feel guilty.

you know those 'pointing back at you' kind of thing?
she good at that.
no wonder i so fragile.

random shit now.....
shit! Land Before Time OST on class 95. such memories! haha.

ok back
like for example, i didnt say i regret meeting you.
i just said that i wish i didnt meet you in the first place.
so all this pain and stupid stuff wont even happen.

yes i know i'm immature about life.
I ADMIT.
even small stuff like this can be super big stuff.

hatred?
i dont even think about who you are in life anymore.
so it wont do any harm to me and it wont kill me. ha.
and why i keep rubbing it in?
shit, i want you realise again and again not to make that god damn mistake with fadli or with who ever else in the future.
and u think of me and still do all those stuff?
you think about me but i think you dont bother.

and being nice?
sheesh.
you being nice?
what about all the sms i sent?
saying hi, asking you if you interested in a job?
no reply?
to me thats ignoring.

and i dont think its nice.

and trying to keep your heart pure?
if your heart is pure, you wont do all those stuff lah ok.
esp drinking. geez!


tried to be my friend?
try harder ah girl.
maybe no need to try also lah ok?
i still remember about you saying that talking aku kau is so rude.
ha. what the hell.
its just the malay version of i and you.
and i only use i and you to someone special.
aku kau, to friends.


freak ah. you wasting my energy typing all this.
why hate one person when u can hate two?
i can be the babi rebus?!

eh go burn those neoprints lah.
no point keeping it.
just burn.
ayn, if you reading this, go burn my neo prints k.
go burn elmo also.

life w/o you have been great.
o wait, its better.
-endz-




its weird that i smile to everyone i see this few weeks.
those i know, those i hardly know and those i dont know.
all i smiled and they smiled back.
i asked a friend of mine whether there's something wrong with me?
he/she said nothing.
hmm
maybe i forgot to zip up.
haha.


fishing with ben sucks big time.
i aint going fishing no more in the day.
i been like in a oven.
the skin that has been expose to the sun is turning red.
dark red considering i'm already dark.
and it HURTS!
even wearing a shirt takes so much pain to wear it, properly.
haha.

ouch.
and guess who was the one being playful with me sunburns.
nope, not my little brother.
it was my mum.
you should see the looks on her face knowing that i have sunburn and wanting to smack my back hard enough so that i bear the worst pain-showing look.
haha.
but she failed.

my horrible manager really makes us at work run everywhere.
and she fault me for not looking for something properly.
its like so not fair k

argh.

police havent reply to me yet!
why eh?

maybe i should try applying again soon.
then if still no reply, i go for prisons?
hmm. i dont want a job.
i want a career!
job is something that you want to do to get money.
career is something that you want to do for life so that you earn a good living.

and i cant believe that at age 20, a girl is still jobless.
so cerewet for what. go work ah
haha.
idiot you.
want to become professor but dont want to work in office but at home.
grr



eh. super long ah.
i somehow dont know what to do with my blog now.
its soo messy.
i need time to think about how i wanna go about doing this shit.
i think during my off day i do ah.
do nice nice, then leave it for another few months.

eh i hungry. gtg
tata